More like mistakes not taken. The kind I tried to convince myself into taking back in high school, mostly, where even though you knew it'd all end badly, you wanted to "be bad" and do it anyway.
Riiiight. Me be bad.
Well this is to let you know I sure thought about it. Often.
There, I said it and sent it out into the virtual void.
This line of realization began nearly a month ago as I was sharing my testimony with someone who's becoming a close friend. I mentioned a few of the mistakes not taken from my later high school years...one in particular that another guy took before I got the chance. My friend observed, "It's almost like he made the mistake for you." And the truth is he did.
So why was I spared? I meet so many people whose mistakes have cost them dearly. So many who've had their lives altered, perhaps even deeply wounded by the mistakes they've made. I feel my life has been altered because of scars not received from mistakes I might have made if only given the chances, which, thank God I didn't feel I had at the time.
In fact, that's the story of the Christian life. All true believers are changed because of scars not received. Christ took our sin and scars upon Himself. And by His wounds we are healed. Each of us, no matter the mistakes we've made and the disfigurements we've inflicted on our lives are received into utter cleanliness and purity through belief in Christ. That's a truth that NEVER gets old to me, but it's being renewed afresh tonight.
Just as I can't boast in my own salvation but in the Provider and Commencer of that salvation, in a smaller measure I can't boast that I was somehow smarter than everyone else in avoiding some of the pitfalls of puberty. It's just that God in His grace wouldn't let me get very far.
Before you think I'm some pious braggart, let me assure you this is a comprehension that's cut me to my core. I don't think I was smarter than anyone else and somehow saw through a bunch of the traps, deftly avoiding while others dropped headlong. I only think God, for some reason and apart from anything I ever deserved, let me learn from other people's mistakes. This was a grace, pure and plain. But I didn't deserve it. And my heart breaks even now when I think of those whose sin got the best of them. I pray the Word I sewed then has taken root since, or that somehow they have been led to Christ. What I deserved was to screw up my life any way my mucky mind could come have come up with. I feel I've had what pride I've got in me destroyed this evening and been made thankful for grace again.
I hope I can keep learning this way; that somehow my mistakes will be minimal. I pray for that kind of wisdom.
But bad mistakes...I've made a few and I'll keep making some. But my prayer tonight is one of great humility before a loving God for granting me a grace in my growing-up years that I didn't deserve. He still gives me that grace. And I only pray He'd keep growing me in discipline and wisdom and love. That He'd keep my heart open to advice from the godly.
Let not your heart envy sinners, but continue in the fear of the Lord all the day.
---Proverbs 23:17
